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✩ LiYonG ' vAnEssA
✩ 9-TeeN gOin 20 .
✩ 30.08.89 .
✩ NUS Undergraduate tO be.
✩ Only Music in my life.

♥ Leow Jiunn Yuan (:


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*Able to Survive in Chemistry
*Able tO Graduate with Honours in CHEM
*Maintain GPA 3.5 and abv for every Semester
*One Birthday wish to come True
*Visit Taiwan!
*Genting Trip in June!
*New Shoes and clothes :)
*fOrever with my Darling :D

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      Date: Saturday, October 23, 2004
      Time: 12:02 PM
    ~haiz.. tt feeling.. seem to cum back again le...~

      haiz.. veri tired sia.. dunnno y lehx.. nowadays feeling abit moody le.. cuz lyk nth to do!! haiz.. veri sian.. do anithin also no heart de..after i had wanted to gif up on him.. my heart lyk lost a part lo.. cuz dun felt tt it's a whole.. there's smthin missin.. n tt feeling.. hurtx.. felt like crying.. but i held back e tears.. yest realli cannot tahan le.. broke out into tears at nite.. cry again.. i miss him.. miss his voice.. his care for mi.. his everitihin.. haiz.. i mayb stupid.. but.. i can't control my mind.. all e memories i had wif him keep flashing up.. everitme i closed my eyes.. there's always him in there.. it's nice.. but it hurtx..

      i tried not to.. but cannot.. i had tried to ignored him.. everitime i did tt, i wanted to cry..for him,i'm willing to gif up.. i dowan him to be tong ku.. dowan him to be troubled..but i jux dunno wat's gotten into mi.. i jux love him.. pple ask mi," if e sea is 100m deep, wat is my love for him?" e ans is,"if e tears i dropped in e ocean can be found,i'll stop loving him.." he will always be in my heart.. no matter if i'm goin to let go.. i dun dare to look at him animore.. i ignored him, treat him as invisible, tried to be happi in front of him..but.. it's all fake de.. haiz.. i cannot bring myself to show e real mi.. i'm tired.. realli tired..

      todae hab co.. so tired.. cuz in e morning played table tennis n after recess, dancing! luckily.. e teacher taught so long den onli teach abit.. haiz.. learnt half onli.. den final dance, quite alot of pple c.. so paiseh.. haiz.. den walk in e rain.. so cold sia.. den went to practice lo.. suddenly play till half way den not feeling well le.. headache.. tink too much?donno leh.. cuz not feelin secured all tis while.. mayb i depended on him too much? now without him.. abit not used to it bah.. but wat abt him? had he forgotten mi? does he realli dun care abt mi le? i dunno.. all tis qns.. keep popping up.. how i wished.. i'll receive his calls again..i dun mind other things le.. realli dun mind le.. i noe wat i realli wants..but do i haf e choice.. to choose it?or i onli haf one way? dunno.. i wish to be blur lo.. rather dowan tink of so mani things.. live in a blur blur world.. wher i can realli be TRULY happy.. no worries,no troubles.. it's a nice feeling...

      k la,todae dunno wat to say le.. feeling moody again.. all feelings lai de. hahaz.. cont next blog..


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